Do you wish to improve your listening skills and how to get better at listening? Listening skill improvement is very important in daily life. If you ask the average person if he or she is trying to listen to the interviewee, will everyone tell you that they are great listeners? Reading this article listening skill improvement is certain.
They will tell you that is a given, because for God’s sake, how could you possibly talk to anyone if you didn’t listen to what he was saying to you? But is that so?
Do we tend to talk or listen more in conversation? Do our conversations boil down to competing with an interlocutor, who will over whom, or who will speak more and faster?
Unfortunately, most communication problems arise as a result of poor listening, or lack of active listening to the interlocutor.
How important is it good to listen to the interviewee? A lot! For communication to make any sense, it must be two-way.
Any further step in the conversation only makes sense if it consists of smart questions and careful listening and analysis of the answers.
After all, how will you ask intelligent questions if you have not listened carefully to the answers to the questions you asked earlier? And without the right questions and listening carefully there is no dialogue!
The ability of conscious listening
Communication is one of the most important skills in life, and especially listening as a very significant part of communication. While this is a skill we learn from the earliest, listening seems to be the part we are least comfortable with.
Many people consider listening and speaking to be one and the same skill, but although they both make communication skills, they are very different. Because of our active mental, analytical mind, the most common information we hear is not original to the one our interviewee said.
Below in this article are some 10 good tips of listening and how to be good at listening.
Improving your listening skills is very important in your life. Here are 10 steps on how to improve your listening skills to help you actively listen to your interlocutor:
10 Steps How To Improve Your Listening Skills
Listening skill improvement is essential and here is how to improve our listening skills and how to get better at listening in these 10 easy steps.
1. Be open-minded
Do not make any conclusions before your interlocutor starts speaking. An open mind means free from the past and previous conclusions and assumptions. Be aware of your assumptions and do not let them affect how you listen to the interviewee. Don’t make any conclusions about the source of the message before you hear it.
2. Concentrate on the message
Listening and understanding are not the same things. Control the interference of the external environment. Remove all the noise and focus on the interlocutor message. Don’t let your mind drift to the other side, concentrate on the interviewee.
3. Avoid mental counter-arguments
Do not mentally discuss the counter-arguments of the interviewee in your mind as he or she speaks. It is a common mistake that in a conversation, instead of listening, we think about what we will do and how we will respond to the interviewee. The point is, in a conversation, we discuss arguments out loud, not in ourselves while the interviewee is speaking.
Listening Skill Improvement Number 4. Control your emotions
In situations of emotional upset, it is impossible to actively listen to the interviewee. It is impossible to do two different things at the same time, to experience some emotion and to think or listen at the same time. The human mind works on the principle of either-or, switch off one to include another. Two things cannot be included at the same time. First, calm down, turn off emotions, and only then can you listen.
5. Do not show that you have previous experience
If you have experienced a similar situation before, do not let the interviewee see it. First, wait to hear everything you need to hear, and then relate to previous experiences, because one often makes the wrong conclusions based on experiences one does not actually remember as well as one thinks.
6. Do not foil attention
If you miss something in your hearing, do not nod and acknowledge something you have not heard. It is much worse for an interlocutor to catch you lying that you heard something from him that you did not hear and understand than to tell him openly that you did not understand and to ask him for clarification.
7. Read non-verbal messages
Keep eye contact and closely monitor the person’s facial expression and body language. In communication, you will learn much more about the true motives of the interviewee through how his / her body responds to certain elements of speech. Especially in the persuasion process, body language has several times more impact on the interlocutor than the word speech itself. It is much more important how we said something than what we said.
8. Do not interrupt the interviewee.
Try to have the conversation alternately present one and the other. Allow the interviewee to finish their thought completely, and then start with your story. Only when you fully listen to it will you be able to intelligently ask. Control the desire to end the interlocutor’s thoughts aloud.
9. Don’t rush for answers.
Research shows that we can listen four times faster than we can talk, so we have the ability to analyze ideas as they come up and be ready to receive new ideas all the time. So there is no reason to rush with reactions. Urgent reactions usually result in conflict.
10. Conclude and repeat through the dialogue.
Make sure you repeat what you heard. Also, summarize his story aloud in his own words. Give him your interpretation of what you heard. Communication is not the same thing your interlocutor wanted you to understand what you really understood. Most often there is a difference in interpretation, which is the most common source of later misunderstandings.
Active listening is one of the basic tools in dealing with conflict situations. Conflicts are most often spread and developed precisely because neither side is willing to listen to the other. Look at our political life.
Is it a dialogue or a bunch of monologues that no one listens to except the speakers themselves? Why do you think the state and economy are in disarray? Can mutually beneficial solutions be obtained through the forced imposition of personal persuasion or through constructive dialogue?
I am amazed at how many people do not listen to their interlocutors, that is, how much they listen to themselves. This is even reflected in the profession which should, as a rule, be the best in active listening, journalism.
How many times have I seen an interview on television where, instead of listening to the answer after the question and then commenting, he first gives himself a long and detailed answer to his question, so the role of the interviewee is often reduced to a nod? For all of this listening skill improvement is essential.
Listening skill improvement – Listener and speaker communication skills
A common problem that occurs in family communication is the existence of so-called highly ritualized or established misguided communication patterns, which usually lead to an escalation of conflict or to withdrawing from feelings of anger and hurt. In family dialogue listening skill improvement can help solve relationship problems.
The goal of the communication skill of the listener and the speaker is to prevent these unpleasant feelings by ensuring that participants in the communication receive and send complete information.
Specifically, in conflicting situations when a confrontation occurs, one person may say something that is not appropriate for the other person, and this is a trigger for her to withdraw or to attack. That way, there is no room for the first or second person to say to the end what they would like and the message they send is not fully transmitted.
The communication skill of the listener and the speaker can lead to a more constructive relationship, which implies, first of all, that the persons listen to each other fully, with care, without prompt judgment and hasty behavior.
The role of the listener
There are several specific techniques that can help practice the role of a good listener in communication. The repetition technique implies that the listener repeats literally the sentences uttered by his partner.
As part of the reflection technique, the listener’s task is to find out which feeling is in the background of the partner’s words and to check with him whether he has made the correct conclusion about it. Finally, a validation technique whereby the listener shows the partner that their perspective is understandable.
It is the task of the psychologist to constantly coordinate the direction of communication back and forth to check that the listener has correctly received the message his partner sent him.
Listening skill improvement with the role of the speaker.
In addition to learning how to listen in communication, how we express our verbal message is also important. These skills are just as essential as listening skills.
Often, one of the partners begins to express concern about something without first considering whether the topic is worth his concern. If one partner wants to say something or tell the other partner, he should use short and clear sentences.
As soon as the listener or other communication partner understands the message, he can present his perspective and then move into the speaker’s role.
However, this process does not guarantee that one or the other partner will not feel angry or that they will not take a defensive stance on the received message, but it is important that they hear the other person’s perspective and convey it in full.
During practice, one needs to refine the skills of focusing on the interlocutor, seek to understand the perspective of the other, and improve the skills of active listening.
What should not be done is to obscure a defensive stance, criticize the speaker, give him lectures or give advice.
Once the skills of the listener and the speaker have been adopted, then they move on to the second stage in conflict resolution in communication called problem-solving. As we have seen, we do nothing here but create a sound basis for the next step in communication.
Listening Skill Improvement – Improve listening skills
Here are some tips of listening. Approximately half of the communication activity consists of receiving verbal (verbal, spoken) messages. listening.
Good listening means that the recipient of the message is watching carefully and with understanding what has been said.
Communication exists only if one hears, listens to, and understands the message and sees the non-verbal cues accompanying the spoken, and if not, the communication in terms of the transaction did not even occur.
Active listening is an important element of the communication process. It is one of the basic communication skills on which other more complex professional skills rest.
Active listening is, in fact, an endeavor of the listener to help himself or herself and the interlocutor to clarify the messages. Because the person does not need to be clear about the message that he or she wants to the conveyor is not communicated with precision.
The listener decodes and checks the information received from the interviewee by sending him a message about how he has heard and understood him.
Active communication is an integral part of certain communication and professional skills such as paraphrasing, asking questions and summarizing.
By actively listening to another person, we actually send a message to hear and understand her problem. To see how she feels, to help her think about that problem and to find other solutions.
To believe in the person and that she can find her own good solution. In order to be able to call listening active, it is necessary for the listener to use the skills of paraphrasing, questioning, and compression. And this is how to get better at listening. I hope these tips of listening will be helpful in future daily life.